Ugh it’s that time of the year again. The one where everyone starts making their best of the year lists and every year I get suckered into making one.
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Nightcrawler is a cynical and satirical look at the media. It takes place in L.A. but this isn’t the sunny City of Angels, it’s the dark, seedy, unethical side of it. Its hero runs a small successful business by exploiting, deceiving and manipulating everyone who gets in his way. It fully commits to delivering the media slogan of, “If it bleeds, it leads,” to horrifying heights, never feeling the need to let the audience off easy. Oh and it’s a comedy.
Willkommen, bienvenue, welcome, to my top 25 films of 2013!
I tend to enjoy Luc Besson’s films. There’s something so endlessly watchable about his brand of dumbness. However, Lucy is the dumbest movie about smart people I’ve ever seen. The character in the movie uses a 100% of her brain by the end of the film which results in the film using 0% of it’s brain. It’s the type of movie that expects its audiences to turn off their brains at the door.
The first time I remember going to the movies was in 1999, I was six years old, turning seven, that year. It was the first outing that I was privy to that didn’t involve a kid’s menus, a colouring mat, or a playground. This was something adults got to do. This was something magical.
After season five 24 became nothing more than a show with great action and uninspired and redundant stories. The show and Jack Bauer were running on fumes. After season 8 ended, the cast and crew of the show talked for years about a possible movie. But what was finally decided was a 12 episode limited series that would still cover 24 hours but set in London. Maybe it was the long break, maybe it was the shorter episode order, maybe it was the change in location or maybe it was all of those things but 24: Live Another Day was an enjoyable season of 24 that made me want more seasons of 24 in the future.
Nothing will ever be as shocking as the Red Wedding back in season 3. It will undoubtably be a moment in the show’s history that will be impossible to top in terms of viewers reaction. But as anyone who’s seen the fourth season of Game of Thrones, you know that there were plenty of big moments to behold and plenty of main characters to watch die. Season 4 proved that Game of Thrones can still be a treasure trove of trauma.
Dawn of the Planet of the Apes is the most depressing blockbuster movie of the summer. It’s an absolute bummer and I loved every minute of it.
That’s what the Planet of the Apes franchise has always been. They’ve always offered us social commentary on our world, while giving us a nihilistic gut punch in the end. They were always a true bummer.
I go into every comedy sequel with low expectations. Why? Because there has never been a good comedy sequel. It’s always the studio saying look how much money so and so movie made; let’s make another one that’s the exact same movie but not as funny and original. So, when 21 Jump Street became the sleeper box office hit in the summer of 2012, a sequel was inevitable.
22 Jump Street is the best comedy sequel ever made!
Well damn, another exorcism movie! We’ve seen so many movies and shows approach this concept without offering anything new to the formula. It’s still chilling to watch an exorcism take place on screen but we can always predict the elements involved. Nonetheless, no one loves exorcisms as much as Scott Derrickson. His first big budget film was The Exorcism of Emily Rose, a film that divided audiences when it was first released. That film combined a traditional court room drama with the conventions of a horror/exorcism film. Similar to The Exorcism of Emily Rose, Derrickson approaches Deliver Us From Evil by combining the horror genre with another one, a cop drama.
The X-Men films are our last connection to the superhero films of the early 2000s. The films weren’t particularly great, with the series hitting a low point beginning with X-Men: The Last Stand and being followed with the absolutely awful X-Men Origins: Wolverine. Whatever good the first two movies had done, disappeared, and no one could understand why 20th Century Fox just didn’t reboot the franchise.
What a great time it is to be a comic book nerd! Not only are comic book movies dominating the theatres, they are now heading to our television sets. DC has already earned success, with Arrow, which is the most watched show on The CW, and Marvel launched Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D., last year, to a tepid response from audiences.
It was obvious that both Marvel, and DC would launch more shows after the success of those two projects, but who would have thought that we’d be seeing the launch of this many comic book projects. DC alone is launching four comic book shows this year, while Marvel has announced the launch of the long rumoured, Agent Carter TV show, and will be releasing Daredevil next year to begin the road to their The Defenders mini series.
Here is what we know about all these shows so far.
When we first see Spider-Man in, The Amazing Spider-Man 2, he is free falling through the city of New York. He’s in his classic red, and blue suit, he’s web-slinging like I’ve never seen Spidey web-sling like before. You hear the news chopper talk about a hijacking turned car chase, and you see Spider-Man head towards the scene. The scene gives us the wise-cracking Spidey, who’s not only worried about stopping the chase, but also protecting the random citizens who are getting caught in the middle of everything. This is the Spider-Man we’ve have not seen in any of the movies before, at least not one that is portrayed, and executed this perfectly.
The Amazing Spider-Man 2 gave me the Spider-Man I’ve always wanted to see on screen, and for that I’m thankful. However, that is as far as my compliments go. Because, after that scene, The Amazing Spider-Man 2, turns into an inconsistent, bloated, and nonsensical mess.
The summer movie season is about to start this week with the release of The Amazing Spider-Man 2, which didn’t make my list. It’s the blockbuster movie season, where studios put out big bucks in order to make an even bigger investment. Like every year, this is the season where we find a big mix of movies, ranging from comedies, to super hero movies, to monster movies, to disaster films, to action-packed thrill rides. Many will turn out to be absolute crap, but a few should blow our minds.
You’ve never seen a Bible story done quiet like Noah before. This is not an adaptation, or a big budget retelling of the classic Biblical tale, this is the story of Genesis after a page one rewrite. It combines fantasy the way you see in Greek Myths, and big blockbuster films, with theological debates you usually find in smaller, more independent films. It is a flawed film, but even when it stumbles the moments it succeeds are truly remarkable. It’s basically a Bible film made for me.
300 became an unknown sleeper hit back in 2006. Director Zack Snyder created a wholly stylized world, and filled it with six packs, testosterone, and some of the most quotable lines of movie dialogue. That was 2006, this is 2014, and we have a prequel/sequel/parallel story to the original, in, 300: Rise of an Empire. So, after eight years, was anyone even clamouring for another 300 movie? Well, certainly not me, I was not even a big fan of the first movie. Loved the stylized violence, but hated the simple-minded, and male driven nature of it’s story-telling. However, I was curious, Snyder wasn’t directing it, and Eva Green was the movie’s female lead, and villain.
I never liked Captain America growing up. Always found him boring and a bit of a square, basically, I felt that he was just a way for America to show off their patriotism, and to compete with Superman for being the moral compass of their comics. I mean, the guy’s wearing the American flag on his chest. However, my opinion on Captain America changed after I watched Captain America: The First Avenger.
Captain America’s first entry in the Marvel Cinematic Universe turned out to be the Marvel’s best Phase One movie but also turned out to be my favourite Marvel movie. It was just a great movie from to start to finish; filled with with great character moments, a lot of heart, and is the only marvel film to earn it’s love story.
Kickstarted from cancelation, the Veronica Mars movie, had a lot riding on its shoulders. Not only did it have appease the show’s diehard fans and newcomers but also appease the over 90,000 backers, who, altogether chipped in a total of $5.7 million to fund the movie on Kickstarter. Creator and in this case writer and director, Rob Thomas, made a promise to fans, “We will deliver the Veronica Mars follow-up that you’ve always wanted,” and as a fan of the TV show, I think he and his team delivered on that promise.
The LEGO Movie could have easily been a hundred minute commercial but, instead, becomes an ode to imagination and creativity. It manages to be a film, that has incredible substance, but also has the ability to get audiences to buy LEGO products. At times, frantic fun and, at other times, a heartfelt love letter to the LEGO brand itself. Part Toy Story and part South Park, The LEGO Movie perfectly encapsulates the spirit and fun of LEGO and why so many adults and children, alike, are in love with the brand.
So, last year, under the influence of narcotic infused cough syrup and antibiotics, I wrote a post trying to convince my best friend and confidant Emerald to start watching Arrow. She freaked, had a boygasm and said she’d watch the show; she never did. I’ve also told her to watch GIRLS (approx. 2 years), The Mindy Project (January of this year), Game of Thrones (think she started it but never got passed S1 E2), Breaking Bad (don’t think I even told her but now I am), Heathers (cause it was Mean Girls before Mean Girls) and Buffy the Vampire Slayer (to which said, gross, no). However, she did watch Midnight In Paris…only after I bought her the DVD and then had to continuously ask her if she saw it yet.
Other people would have given up, other people would not be creating a post like this and other people would not be as obsessive as me but I ain’t no quitter, I’m a swallower. Ooo, I said that wrong.
In addition, to all those shows that I’ve already told her to watch, I’m adding a new one: Happy Endings.